what is it about a good fight

[K&D]

what makes you have a destructive personality? i've found i have real momments of destructiveness, that lure of a real fight, i don't mean a girly sort of hair pulling your a bitch thing. i was reading what L-rod and some of the others were writting, something Yabyum said about likeing a good fist fight. there are some people, i am one of them who just seem to have that personality.

something about getting the shit beat out of me in a good fight seems to some how be appealing on some level. i remeber reading about abbie hoffman describing how he got the shit kicked out of him at the democratic national convention 68 and how he said he just smiled and bleed all over his american flag shirt...he was the destructive type to an extreme sometimes too...is it purely chemical, are we adrenialen junkies?

i find with me, i'm generally an organizer and uniter among friends, i make sure everyones together, i'm the supportive one...but when i get mad two things happen i get really mad and the other thing that happends is a lot of the times i think it feels really good. maybe my issue is that i bottle things up, but i don't think that is it. i think some people have a DNA disposition to be bridgeburners, trouble makers and lovers of destruction.

for me its like an extreme of either, i'm either building really hard or burning everything in sight.

it be intresting to hear from the other destruction lovers i know on this site...and i'm not saying its a bad thing to be one...just an observation. there unfortunatly tends to be a self desctuctive clause in many of us that we have to watch out for though.

[Lightning Rod]

K&D,

Don't get all Fight Club on me.

I love a good verbal fight. But violence is never good for anyone. I've had ribs broken and teeth knocked out and rings ripped from my ear. It's not fun. But in extreme conditions it is sometimes necessary.

But I'm a little like you. I'm very patient right up until the time when I become extremely impatient.

Usually I can defuse the situation with humor or fast talking. But at some points, like Yabyum says, you have to break out the Docs.

I'm not afraid of a fight, but I sure don't go looking for them.

As far as being destructive, when I am destructive it is usually self-destructive.

[Doreen Peri]

I abhor violence.

When in doubt? Run like hell.

[K&D]

dor- cute...

L-rod- don't get me wrong L-rod, because i'm a women/girl whatever...there are different standard for me i havent been physically destructive to anything more then a stack of pappers since i was in middle school.

i defused an issue today, i was really proud. i think if i allowed myself to get more mad i'd not be so destructive...but maybe i'd just be more destructive just more often.

you don't like that feeling though, something about power maybe. i mean if we were talking about the beats, didn't they have some sort of step away bigger picture understanding of pain as well...maybe thats what i'm talking about, because i'm not talking about likeing physical pain, i'm talking about the rush, the feelings inside, not the physical feelings.

i've always depended on my ability to talk my way out of things, it comes with being dyslexic...that and humor, but even my humor is very self deprecating.

[Doreen Peri]

K&D-
It wasn't meant to be cute. It's my very serious philosophy about being around violence. I literally run from it. And I suggest you do the same.

I wrote the story about the most violent act I had ever witnessed firsthand. We were standing in a parking lot. A guy got angry at another guy about some petty thing he said. He instigated a fist fight which escalated within a few short minutes. The guy took a tire iron and beat out the windows of the other guy's car after chasing him around the parking lot with it. After he beat the windows out of his car, he beat the glass out of his eyeglasses with the tire iron and proceeded to smash his face and head in, blood everywhere. He was bleeding to death. He got behind the wheel of his car which had a broken out windshield and took off down the road weaving because he couldn't see anything because of the blood. To this day, I don't know whether he lived or died.... whether he crashed his car into other cars and killed someone else. I know nothing.

All I know is that I witnessed that type of violence which started as a fist fight in a parking lot of a bar in 1978 and ever since then, if I see a fist fight start, I run like hell. And not a minute too soon.

I abhor violence.

[stilltrucking]

more evidence of what a sick old man i am.
Yabyum is so normal
I mean that in a good way
you know a manly fist fight.
me I never looked for a fair fight
I can only think of one time I tried to start one. that was over forty years ago.
crazy mike told me not to look for trouble, it will find you, but if it does defend yourself, if you need to pick up brick a stick anything for a weapon
my school yard fights were bloody affairs.
just hurt them quick and hurt them bad
I knew what was on the end of my fork
it was murder
it wasn't just a fight
I never fought unless I was out to kill.
spent a night in Astoria Oregon thinking how I was going to murder some one.
But then I thought about karma. And what I had coming. That is the only thing that stopped me I think.
I came back to Tennessee and joined a Quaker meeting.
The only fights I enjoy these days is with Doreen, she is such a worthy advisary. I hope we are still going at it for many years to come.
The problem with Iraq will not be over when the soldiers come home. They will bring that violence home with them. Already there are increase domestic violence among returning veterans.

Your post reminds me of song I heard last night

the lyrics something like this

"I want to be with you when it all comes down...
when the phones go dead...
when the children burn the town down."

It got so bad with me when I was a kid Crazy Mike got me a punching bag. that seemed to help. I have not hit anyone or done any violence in over forty years. but it was close in Astoria. Finally just blew it off, figured I got what was coming. Thinking about the man who wrote Zen And The Art Of Motorcycle Maintenance and what his son said to the man that so enraged him. I know what I said to the guy in baltimore just before he hit me upside the head with that two by four. Lines from a Paul Craft song, "lean on Jesus before he leans on you." Turns out I was the one that should have done the leaning. Sorry to be so morbid.

Work out, do something physical, play tennis, abhor violence.




Not sure what this all about KD, maybe this is my virtual yard sale. I got karma to burn, karma to write off. I just wish I had some talent so I could make fiction out of it instead of spilling my guts

Doreen here is another spider web for you, part of the AS thing is getting fixated on things, right now it is Virginia Woolf

Fiction is like a spider's web, attached ever so slightly perhaps, but still attached to life at all four corners. Often the attachment is scarcely perceptible.

With a little luck i will be in the hospital for thirty days next month. testing a new diabetes drug, make five grand. Going to cut and paste all this crap I been posting maybe fictionalize it.

Clay not to change the subject but I think you mentioned when you were playing in the capitol you were stnding on a mosaic of a star set in the floor, maybe that is why I thought of that pendulum.

[K&D]

"I just wish I had some talent so I could make fiction out of it instead of spilling my gut"

me too! but maybe spilling your gut is a talent, most people have a hard time doing it. most people are bad at listening too, and i think your good at that, your still trying to pick things up.

[lovingpenfull]

Pink Floyd said:

Run like hell...You better run.

They also said:

Waiting to cut out the deadwood.
Waiting to clean up the city.
Waiting to follow the worms.
Waiting to put on a black shirt.
Waiting to weed out the weaklings.
Waiting to smash in their windows
And kick in their doors.
Waiting for the final solution
To strengthen the strain.
Waiting to follow the worms.
Waiting to turn on the showers
And fire the ovens.
Waiting for the queens and the coons
and the reds and the jews.
Waiting to follow the worms.

Pretty ugly getting violent, Hitler and Pol Pot were some extreme examples that make the point that the right mix of an unrealistic ideology and a little destructive excitment can turn the world into a burning concentration camp. But I know that the original post was asking why sometimes riff raff, trouble, craziness, destructiveness, drama, is interesting and exciting. I think it is just because that is the nature of existance: there is most of the time a leaning toward the positive punctuated by a the occational leap toward the negative to define the positive. Keep it within reasonable bounds and Run Like Hell if it escalates into more than you can handle.

[K&D]

no kidding...its the idea of thinking your righteous, and being a destructive power freak i think

[mousey1]

I don't like smashing things up or popping people in the noses. I don't care for those who do.

If it's fight or flight I'll take flight every time.

I would however, if cornered, not think twice about fighting my way out. Therefore always leave yourself an out.

I like the saying.....

You couldn't fight your way out of a wet paper bag!

This of course has nothing to do with anything....

I just like the saying!

But really I never met a wet paper bag I didn't like......so why would I want to fight my way out of one....

Just some food for thought!!!

At this point in the game you may well be asking yourself what it is I am smokin'!

I assure you I am as straight as a pig's tail...er I mean arrow!

[YABYUM]

Ah yes.......fighting.
I'll admit it.....I have many times went looking for a fight.
Mostly with complete strangers. I have done this sober. I have done this smashed. I have gotten my ass KICKED. I have KICKED someone elses ass. Some situations could have possibly been avoided, but I never was patient enough.

I don't know what it is about a fight that I love. Beaten or Beating, It's the same surge of euphoria. I am amazed that I have not been stabbed or seriously fucking injured as of yet. This one time, in Montreal..........well.........nevermind. I'll just say that I walked away and have no idea how.

I have two very opposite personalities. I am generally a calm smooth operator. But sometimes a guy will just hit that button on me and I go off. I am getting much better. I havent been in a fight since Montreal, but in Montreal it seemed that fights were just easier to get into. Frenchmen hated me. I hated them.

I have never commited a violent crime. I have gotten into street fights. Streets fights with able bodied youngsters just like me.
They could have walked away. I dont fucking corner weak ass bitches with glasses, and I don't just attack motherfuckers. It's more of a look that we give each other and then a few words and then it's either walk away or its time to throw haymakers.
The other guy gets into character just like me, that's why they turn and fight. We are of the same mold.

I think it's pretty cool that a chick digs fights. We should probably never have children together.

I have often thought about joining a boxing school or some kind of shit like that, but then I forget all about it while I'm trying to find my cigarettes.

[lovingpenfull]

Bob Marley said:

if you get down and you quarel every day,
you singing praise to the devils, I say, oh
why not help one another on the way?
make it much easy

[stilltrucking]

.

But sometimes a guy will just hit that button on me and I go off.

Yeah that is all well and good. But I say don’t let nobody punch your buttons. Reminds me of a story a trucking partner told me.
Now this part is bullshit cause the difference between cowboys and truck drivers is Cowboys got the bull shit on the outside of their boots. Well anyway one of the best pardners I have ever had was a huge man over six four I bet, built like a grizzly. Kind and gentle he seemed to me. The only idiosyncrasy I noticed was he absolutely could not watch a slasher movie. I can watch them but I don’t like them. Told me the story about one night in an alley behind a bar a drunk kept trying to start a fight with him. He warned the guy to back off, warned him a couple of times. The drunk kept coming at him. The drunk had blood in his eye. Too bad the drunk did not realize it was his own blood. The scene reminded me of the movie raiders of the lost arc. Where Harrison ford is facing the huge turbaned Arab who is twirling the sword, and he says, shit and just shoots the guy. All I could do was shrug and tell my buddy if it was me I would stay out of bars, I would avoid drunks. I think there will be a lot of veterans coming home from the middle east that won’t like slasher movies anymore either Yabyum I grew up with the Friday Night fights. My uncle used to love them. I think there is a fine line between manly fights and insanity. Kind of like the old west where there was always someone a little faster on the draw. There is always someone a little crazier too. I wish you would take better care of yourself. I need the got dam poetry.

Pol Pot wasn't he an example of the old adage "the enemy of my enemy is my friend" I think he was a friend at one time? Fighting the Viet Cong? I maybe I am wrong.

Pink Floyd the only album I have listened to is Dark Side Of the Moon. I can almost still hear it. I wish I could remember the bit about don’t give me that do good bullshit, then the sound of a cash register and go get your own stash. Still giving it all away myself. My little sister, I thought I could solve all her problems by throwing money at her.

KD, that thing yesterday with the Quaker (I think they got that name because they Quaked before god? Kind of like the adrenalin shakes?) I reminded of the line of a jitterbug song, “you can’t be any better then the worst you recognize” were my eyes dead?, were my jaws clenched? I don’t think I was angry, I mean I didn’t have the shakes or anything, but I was making a special effort to look into the guys eyes. Have you ever felt you could see the light in peoples eyes? I got lost on the way to the Quaker meeting I stopped and asked a cop for directions, I looked him in the eye and thanked him. His eyes were blue; maybe I looked too long because they almost flashed like blue neon That is probably just the AS that makes me think I can see the light in peoples eyes. After yesterday I feel like I am back to square one. I think I was gitting a little to cocky about being a Quaker. Fuck religion. There is a peace vigil on Thursday evenings, going to do that from now on. Catch my Quaker buzz on cecil’s Sunday stream .

Speaking of pigtails, you ought to see my nose. Been broken so many times it is straight as a pig's tail too.

I got to go read a yabyum poem.


Additional comment
lovingpenfull
I was wrong about Pol Pot but:

It has been argued that the Khmer Rouge may not have come to power without the destabilization of the Vietnam War, particularly of the American bombing campaigns to "clear out the Vietnamese sanctuaries" in Cambodia. William Shawcross argued this point in his 1979 book Sideshow.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pol_Pot

[hester_prynne]

I'm with lovingpenfull and Marley....I hate fighting, I think it's really stupid and unproductive and immature. Most fights seem to happen when people are drinking or brainwashed by religious fervors or some other God awful sucker beliefs.

The closest I ever get to fighting is in trying to peacefully resolve it or just staying away from that kind of mentality all together....as it really depresses me, the unawareness of it, the smallness, the trampling of others, or each other....selfish shit for sure.

Why, the blown out fighting ego is really obsolete for anyone who has any brains......which as i grow older I realize, there are not many people on this planet with brains, much less hearts, thank you very much......

Oh I was blinded by ....."myself" rather than the "light" seems a more fitting lyric..... eh?

heh. Lotta that going on in our world these days.....

H

[Arcadia]

I tend to say what I think, that sometimes put me in the middle of fights (not directly phisical, let´s call it verbal, psicological, strategic fights). I hate fights. Today I have one at school with the director and the legal representante. Sometimes I wish I had the capacity to be hipocrit. Just to have an alternative.