place and moment

[Axanderdeath]

I sit on the side of the road for hours chain smokeing and watching the cars roll by with my thumb stuck out. Maybe the next one will be a really hot girl looking for a mystery guy--and that mystery guy'd be me. She'd say come in to twn with me and I'll make you a dinner. She'd live alone in some none exsiting town in the middle of nowhere and we'd drink wine and talk about how she wanted to get out of there and I'd have all these wise things to say like it's all the same no matter where you go. SHe'd say I want to go to paris, and she'd have a map of paris in her bedroom and ask me if I'd been there--I would say no I had not been out of the country. She sigh and say me nither.

I'd get a job in the town a real normale one like a factory job or something. I would not consort with co-workers. Me and that girl would just save are money and then one day some old drunken boy freind show up and I'd end up shoting him and me and her just have to.......

A car is honking up the road I run up hopeing and crossing my fingers. It is a honda civic--she could drive a honda civic. She'd be just smileing at me when i get there holding my huge hockey bag...

The old man says--you can put (hockey bag) it in the trunk...

"I can take you as far a Nithel, thats about a mile from Degville." I stare at him and try to smile. He is not my sweat heart. An old man with green eyes and sunburn cheeks. He half thinks I am crazy and half thinks he is doing a duty for god.

"thanks. Any thing that is west."

"It is more north west, but it is further than you are now." Sounds good.

I do not tellpeople my name unless they ask and I don't talk to me unless they ask me a question. I look down at my shoes and hope to god I am not smelling too much--it does not matter too much with this guy but when she comes alonge......

It is about midnight I am in an all night dinner eating some cheese burgers and fries. I take out my note book....She .....she..... she... is all I can write--She is a ghost girl rideing around in my sad souls thoughts......

She asks me if I loved her and I would say fuck yes, I would say yes as straight as I could and look into he blue eyes and smile and she'd start crying that she did not want it this way and pick up the phone. She'd say you just killed someone, I'll write you when your in jail. I would go sit on the couch with the hot gun and hang my head and when she got off she'd come in and put her arms around me and say I love you baby and that just gets me crying and smile on my face the hell this love goes deep and gone. I say i know you will write but somone'll come along and the I'll just be all alone again.....

The fat lady that runs this dive comes up and says.
"look hun there is a room arond back if you like--40 dollars. I buy a bottle of whisky and go back. It is a shaby room with a small table at the corner and tin foil over the winows. A black substance all over every inch of the walls...this is heart break.... I said it out loud or maybe not I heard it loud enough. Powerlessness of it is what always got me. You can punch the pillow all you like but it will never change a thing. There is a bible on the night stand open on it's back "jake was here, 73" fuck i thought, no one has thouched that since 1973......

The sirens startcoming and she is still holding me tight. She keeps saying it was the right thing to do, and that the truth would be shown and that I was just protecting her and nothing eles could of been done. My mind is a blank--I say write me I wanted her to. I see our red eyes relfelcted in the window as they bust in......

It is one of those mornings that a bird is singing off some where and it feels just like a storm has past like a huge whieght taken of your shoulders--ripples on a lake and sit down and throw rocks and lost in time because that place and moment are all time forever and always.....


Geoff Parsons

[firsty]

this is very good and rich and inspired. it's honestly good enough, very good, to be published, presuming you clean up your spelling etc. was this spontaneous?

[Axanderdeath]

this is very good and rich and inspired. it's honestly good enough, very good, to be published, presuming you clean up your spelling etc. was this spontaneous?

yha I just got a lap top and it has no spell checker--I wrote it fast as you read it probally...