Evolution, Sex, and Mammary Teets

[billectric]

First, small organisms were having sex with each other. They didn't give a rat's ass who was on top. This led to earthworms. Worms have both sexes. Which is a shame and a waste, because nobody wants to have sex with a worm.

The next process on the evolutionary scale is that worms became snakes, then the snakes grew legs and got really big and were called dinosaurs. Rumor has it that Satan took the body of a snake to tempt Adam and Eve, so God made the snake's legs disappear. The snake was like, “I was bleedin’ framed ! You think I wanted that narcissistic cocksucker spirit-humping my spine?” But it was no good; he was convicted. Which is why he has to slither in the dirt all of his days.

So how did "cold-blooded" reptiles grow hair and mammary-teets? For that we have to look at the platypus:
"A semi aquatic egg-laying mammal of Australia and Tasmania having a broad flat tale, webbed feet, and a snout resembling a duck's bill."
Hell of a thing. Sounds like a vision William S. Burroughs might have conjured up when describing the “coke horrors.” And speaking of weird and horrible things from Australia, I haven’t heard from Jason “feral” Evans in a while.

But, see, where philosophers have taken a wrong turn is, they say, "which came first, the chicken or the egg?" when they really should say, "the platypus or the egg." Of course, by starting with a faulty premise, they threw everything else out of joint, until at last you just have this God-awful menagerie. It's taken people who live in tents and wear pith helmets to sort it all out, sticking moths and butterflies to a corkboard with labels.

And so it goes. But I've strayed slightly from the original question. It seems to me that if evolutionists were accurate, you wouldn't be able to dig a post hole without cracking into some missing link skeleton, in some mid-transformation from what it was to what it was becoming.

I actually prefer the theory that Julia Child created everything and then got side-tracked and left the stove on. We are just now smelling something acrid and alarming.

[stilltrucking]

I was digging through the archives looking for a joke someone posted about owls and flat faced bitches when I found this gem.

Pure bk, man I miss your voice.

Feral, sometimes I think I hear him here. A couple of people from Australia here. The wild man who always broke jamelah's heart.

Speaking of Julia Child, I was thinking about that bit you wrote about your dad repairing typewriters. I am thinking hard about getting away from these slippery silicon documents here and going back to a typewriter. Not electric, I want one of those big black manual monsters. The ones that realy make you work. Thwack, Thwack, pound those keys. Then at the bottom of page you pull it out covered with words and still warm from the oven like a loaf of Julia's bread

don't be a stranger.

[MrGuilty]

I been thinking about the evolution of the wo/human
Face.
Jota had a great line "raccoon eyes"
Trying to remember what joke I told on litkicks that made that woman hate me, if not hate then resent.

Was it the one where I said male-feminism is bull shit. any frefix to feminism is bullshit if you ask me. And believe me I know all there is to know about feminism. Why I am always cruising them feminst bars looking for chicks. I go to a lot of poetry slams too.

God all mighty bill I keep digging myself deeper. I never used enough emoticons I said I wish I was Barry Manilow. I wanted to write the songs that make the young girls cry. I noticed they had of picture of them posing with Barry /Manilow jackets.

The other day I wrote that I avoid blow jobs except when absolutely necessary.

Bill you said I was an authentic beat one time, no idea what that means, I said you read like Husserl, do either one of us know what we are talking about.

I am best read with a tank of laughing gas by your side.

I thought I had put a post here about a ship that launched a thousand faces but I guess it was a bad idea.

[Diana Moon Glampers]

hand puppet conversation.

I could think of good reason why I was a turd in the punch bowl for her. I suppose the other one was just being a friend.

if you can't say "there is no redemption" nietzsche said, there is no need for it is what I think he meant. I posted some Awful things to her, totally inappropriate, makes me think I am autistic with people, some people autistic with their four footed friends, me I got aspergers I am sure. Another way of saying social retard I suppose.