So glad...

[stilltrucking]

He came in at Galveston, she at Ellis Island
Benefactors of Baron De Hirsch's efforts to relocate Jews from eastern Europe because the good Baron could read the writing on the walls.

Peasant Jews in their new world finery.
My grandmother and grandfather
Married in Philadelphia in 1915



I forgot the occasion, maybe late forties I think, the marriage of their son.



My grandmother used to give me wonderful baths
Nothing to forgive
I am a priest




Yoda a little too deep for me
But
Joseph Campbell liked those movies a lot.

Nothing to forgive
But I still try to forgive myself.


one more try
infriendship
jt

there maybe worse things than no father
I am not sure
mine taught me well
his hell
is slowly going by

Maybe that is why I am believing in some cosmic return
maybe next time
the next go round
after the next big bang
we won't have to do this anymore

[jimboloco]

very nice to see the two sets of photos,
really
the kid looks scared with a confidant bride
they both look confident later

also interesting how we became the "lost" generation

i am supposed to call my mother tonite
but am being calm and tired.
southern gothic is ubiquitous

[stilltrucking]

"The mother is the first awesome miracle that haunts the child his whole life, whether he lives within her powerful aura or rebels against it."
The Denial of Death. Ernest Becker


http://faculty.washington.edu/nelgee/le ... ghes_1.htm

good night
and good luck with your mother tonight

[stilltrucking]

And then there was Freud
Oedipus got nothing on me



Bits and pieces
It is true
A life lived forwards
But only understood backwards
So now I know why
The screaming shrieking widow was throwing herself on his coffin
The guilt for throwing him out of the house
It was a death sentence for a man like him
But that afternoon of November 22in 1963 when the rage finally erupted out of me
I felt she had stolen my father
Stolen my love for him
It would be another ten years before I learned about my sister
And another twenty years to piece it all together.

Ah shit
Southern gothic.

The things we do for love
Rest in peace Alamo Rose
Rest in peace in Crazy Mike
I love you

[jimboloco]

i don't know shit
i don't know shinola
it's all too much
valhalla halleluja!

[stilltrucking]

It's the Mexacali Blues
Battle Fatigue
Shell shocked
living in a refugee camp
PTSD
That's all I know is shit from shinola
the rest is Greek to me

you said it all

it's all too much
valhalla halleluja!

Onward Christian Soldiers
It is about homelands
maybe
and the insecurities thereof

Live a little buy some Biblical lands
in the occupied territories.

I'll be homeless till the last train leaves the station
strangers in strange lands
that someone always calls home

Sail away
It's great to be an american

[stilltrucking]

I never know where you are coming from Jimboloco. Am I getting on your nerves? Too much talk about my family's survival?

Nobody wants to read about personal stuff.

I appologize for my Jewcentricity


Yes it is a pity the Tutsi did not have a good Baron to save them from their holocaust. I wonder what Bill Gates is up to these days? Do the people of Darfur have a rich German Jew sugar daddy to bring to them to a place of safety?

Ah well

Yes, Valhalla
Sure sounds like a warrior’s paradise to me
I try to think about the Janjaweed as much as I can. I think I understand, but all I really know is shit from shinola.
I think I will go brush my shoes.

I should be doing more. I am grateful someone is.
Janjaweed

[stilltrucking]

The yid looks scared

Yes it looks like she is keeping a hand on his shoulder in case he decides to bolt.


Powerful woman, the most powerful one I have ever known. Such wonderful baths, we played this litlle piggy in the tub. For years I thought I had eleven toes.
She meant no harm I am sure, I was such a little babe, she never thought I would remember I am sure. I was very small, maybe two or three, small enough to fit in her kitchen sink. And Freud thought he was wrong about the seduction of children.
My folks a product of that very Victorian age of his.


What did you say about this picture?
It looks like the kid was on the menu?

Maybe so, but I spent the happiest days of my life in that house.




I am getting nervous
too much personal stuff.
done

lovely rain falling now
sweet sound on the roof.
gentle summer kind sound
and the living is easy
california peaches are cheap
avacodos two for a dollar.

going to eat my microwave pot pie
good night sweet prince

[jimboloco]

yeah that is a cute kid
lucky they are smiling for him
child of lost tribes
where is jerusalem?


the kid looks scared
tho not yiddish
he's looking for a dish of something kosher
and she's wondering about motherhood
before the fall
icarus
took the pic

[stilltrucking]

I did not realize he saw you.

She looks happy, aches my heart, but I am glad he got to see you.

[stilltrucking]

I think jerusalem is in East Texas somewhere.

[jimboloco]

we're not obsessed, man
we got a bit of clarity in the muddle

[stilltrucking]

I got no desire to visit Jeruselam jimbo, but I did want to sail to Ireland.

When I was a kid I was the youngest child at the seders, I remember the old folks saying next year in Jeruselam. But this was before the modern state of Israel came into being. After 1948 I don't remember anyone in my family who showed much interest in moving there. But everybody got to be someplace. I wish I was in Nova Scotia myself.

I always liked the story about the Texan who was on a bible quiz show. The moderator asked him where Jesus was born. The Texan said Port Arthur. The quiz master said no He was born in Palestine. The Texan said, "I knew it was in East Texas somewhere."

[jimboloco]

ha ha
i saw the devil in Savanah
had been sleeping in my car on the Gandy bridge in Tampa Bay
siince Dec 26th, '87, moved out the day after XMAS
went on a drive up to Ashville, was stopped at a sign, about March of '88, a redneck yelled at me "go back to Florida"
so I drove down to the eastern flatlands, thru gothic Savannah, was parked on a road south of town, just resting, wired,wondering where to go, when a couple walked along. The dude was dressed in black, mercy, boots, pants shirt with a big collar, and a huge hat. I had been cursing with absolute frustration, "God Damn God!" and had yelled it out over and over as I was driving down out of the hills into the night. Now it was the next morning, and this dude came walking along and his countenance was remarkable. He has this massive jaw and cheekbones and brow and thw woman walking along with him looked at me and smiled, as tho she knew me. It sent chills thru me totally. I had seen them before as well, somewhere. Or was it a knowing glance, a forlorn hombre deadbeat on the road, or what? It made me leave and drive on back to my spot at the bridge.

Next morning, i woke up and stood on a cement slab at waters edge to piss, slipped on the slick mossy surface and cut my palm wide open on a barnacle under water. Mercy, I got faint, hunkered down, and prayed,
please help me Gawd, help me.
My head cleared up. I held my hand up, it was a clean cut, I could see the tendons, and it did not bleed. I wrapped it up ihn a towel, drovew to the gas station a mile down the road, called the VA emeergency room from a phone booth, and drove there. They treated me real nice, soaked it in betadyne, stiched it up, I felt no pain, and it healed. The next few days I had moved into a room in town and started my comeback.

It wasn't the devil and mrs jones, but she was as homely and beautious as was he, a beast of a man

and have never dared to curse Gawd since that time.

you have to wind up somewhere
somehow those pine woods gove me the spooks, runs from east texas to across north forida,

i once saw a person run across the highway in north forida panhandle
i was the only car in sight
this being bounded from the woods across the road and into the woods again
literally bounded
i think it was an indian

[jimboloco]

i bought my used mercedes suv because it was cheaper than any similar dodge, chevy, or ford station wagon or truck

plan to drive it until it is illegal, another thirty years.
when i can give it a hybrid converter i will.
til then eating lots of beans and farting into the gas tank.