Shameless big bang rhymin'

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mnaz
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Shameless big bang rhymin'

Post by mnaz » November 28th, 2007, 2:06 am

Kingdoms on a pin head, pinhead on a king.
Energy matters and roar, in circles with one oar,
to storm the beaches of yore, miss the oceans wet,
the great temptation to owe my creator a debt.
Ah, the times of crime, the crimes of time.
No reason, and too much rhyme.

Into the big bang top ten a mother's love,
in withering caress of murdered gods above,
in exile of cosmic irrelevance, now come clean,
in sunlight down the barrel of a bone machine,
my destitute poetry of philosophy,
dwarf star philosophy of poetry.

Grateful for the road, lust in solution,
vistas under a cushion, spare change in awe.
Split God into particles, into vibration and articles.
Light is too slow past Centauri, and so is the law.
But the aspens still quake in early November,
and a horizon pulls shamelessly, remember.

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hester_prynne
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Post by hester_prynne » November 28th, 2007, 4:49 am

The first word that gleefully comes to mind after reading this:
Masterful!

You got it Mnaz...
H 8)
"I am a victim of society, and, an entertainer"........DW

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mnaz
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Post by mnaz » November 28th, 2007, 1:27 pm

Thx. hesty. pretty spontaneous here, suitably vague and spacy, and almost no discipline (like usual). I like it. Esp. that "pinhead in a king" bit....

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Arcadia
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Post by Arcadia » November 28th, 2007, 9:37 pm

I love it!! :)

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e_dog
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Post by e_dog » November 28th, 2007, 10:25 pm

seems like could be Grateful Dead lyrics, last two stanza spec'ly.

groovy man.
I don't think 'Therefore, I am.' Therefore, I am.

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stilltrucking
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Post by stilltrucking » December 3rd, 2007, 8:22 pm

amazing mnaz

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joel
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Re: Shameless big bang rhymin'

Post by joel » December 3rd, 2007, 8:36 pm

mnaz wrote:But the aspens still quake in early November,
and a horizon pulls shamelessly, remember.
I have been trying to think what to say, but thanks. Pulls me back in...makes me realize that I ned to stay at the office a bit longer to stay connected to the words...and it's amazing.

Life could never rhyme too much--
and true as all the moderns claim
that rhyme's a rot-broke wooden crutch
for verse, still prop me up: I'm lame.
"Every genuinely religious person is a heretic, and therefore a revolutionary" -- GBShaw

Totenkopf

Post by Totenkopf » December 4th, 2007, 3:05 pm

Remem-burr.......Novem-burr. Sub f-n lime, dudie! Works with Septem-burr tooo. Hey and whaa's up with that old wop calendar where November--Nine Month--is actually 11th Month? Odd. Maybe Robespierre wasn't so f-ed up after all

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mnaz
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Post by mnaz » December 4th, 2007, 3:22 pm

yeah, I was gettin' tired...

....for some reason, everytime I read the title, I wanta call it 'big band rhymin'...

Thank youze.

Totenkopf

Post by Totenkopf » December 4th, 2007, 3:29 pm

Actually as e-d said it does seeem a bit Dead like, not that that's the worst thang one could say about someone's leerics: Bob Hunter had a certain vision, diddn't he? Ah think like a "Wharf Rat" superior to most so-called poesy, and even to the usual drug-store potboilers some take to be stories.

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e_dog
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Post by e_dog » December 4th, 2007, 9:54 pm

ah 'gree.

't Was mentobe a complyment.

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