Dirty Limerick jam

[e_dog]

There was a guy from Toledo
Who's credo was wearing a speedo.
When it came off
The judge said, "Cough."
"Okay, now let's smoke us some weed-o."

[e_dog]

There was a gal from Nantucket
with a @!^$ so long she could $*#% it.
But before you get in it,
Wait just a minute,
That ain't no gal, it's stilltruckin'!

[e_dog]

There was a candidate named Mitt
Who likes to eat crackers and shit.
He said he likes torture
Lady Liberty? He'd torcher
What a wise, stately haircut and wit.

[e_dog]

There was a boy with no ass.
Bowel movements caused an impasse.
He had to shit
from the place where he bit.
Won't you pray for young Rudy next mass?

[e_dog]

A comp'ny named 'tself Blackwater.
Specialties: security 'n' slaughter.
They'll shoot all them 'Raqis.
While wearing sweatshirts and khakis.
Shooting fathers, brothers, mother and daughter.


Some say Blackwater's terrorist; some, not.
The more i've thought about the more i've thought
from what i've heard across the wire
about these armoured guns for hire
I fear that first speaker will get shot.

[jimboloco]

in argentina they got a pink house
and a first gentleman for a spouse
the lady president's a gaucho watches him like a groucho
keeps the keys to the house in her blouse

[e_dog]

Ms. Kirchner's more Hillary than Hill
though Mr. K.'s less Billy than Bill
the latter drink latte'
while the former take mate'
till they've had the fill of their fill.

[jimboloco]

you are the champ

i am just plucky lucky
to be in the same camp

[e_dog]

thar was one jim from saint pete
who did a nice editing feat
he ain't so crass
as to e'er harass
'tis 'ways better to be discrete.

[e_dog]

There was a president on crack.
It made him always attack.
From Afganistan
and on to Iran
forgetting the mess in Iraq.

[jimboloco]

yes you saw my lil bit o editing
it rhymed
which is how i get into troubles with limerick

there was a pagan named edog
who wanted to burn a yule log
he set fire to the agora
AND WHAT A DIASPORA
as the acadummies all went agog

[mnaz]

a pious draft dodger from texas,
snorted copious coke with his exes.
pumps away at crude holes,
runs the flag up his pole,
and may even privatize Jeezus.

[mnaz]

Once a wise man named McCain,
spake not with a prick in your brain.
He put on some Beach Boys,
and shiny new war toys,
now it's bomb bomb bomb bomb bomb Iran!

[mnaz]

Once an old cowboy named Reagan,
fought evil with C.I.A. ray guns.
Presidentes he smashed,
their planes often crashed,
capitalism, all in good fun.

[mnaz]

There once was a corporate media,
that booked all its wars on Expedia,
it's flag waving so passionate,
whip out and pole the electorate,
the birth of high definition tedium.