Hole In One

Post by **Lightning Rod** » June 28th, 2008, 3:53 pm

One of my guilty pleasures is watching golf on TV
I know, it's about as exciting as watching grass grow or paint dry
that's what I like about it.

I'm watching the Buick Open this weekend.
My uncle never won this tournament, but in the sixties (when gas was 35 cents a gallon) he made a hole in one in the tournament and won 50 grand and a new Buick. For six seconds of work. That means that he was making 18 million dollars an hour. But only for six seconds. Call the Union.

Post by **bennie2** » June 29th, 2008, 6:36 am

golf

get a fucking life, LR!

I've been watching the tennis on bbc. i find it to be very dull but then... some of those female players...

they can really...um... grunt.

Post by **mtmynd** » June 29th, 2008, 9:07 am

Weren't the Scots the first golfers?

Post by **bennie2** » June 29th, 2008, 9:12 am

yes. i think "we" invented it.

only a drunken scotsman could come up with that idea. let's make wee balls. each player gets a wee ball each. and a stick. each player gets a ball and a couple of sticks with different shape, weight and length ends. and you have to whack the ball towards a wee hole, which we will dig a few hundred yards away....

<embed src="http://www.metacafe.com/fplayer/870700/ ... s_golf.swf" width="400" height="345" wmode="transparent" pluginspage="http://www.macromedia.com/go/getflashplayer" type="application/x-shockwave-flash"> </embed><br><font><a href="http://www.metacafe.com/watch/870700/ro ... lf/">Robin Williams - Golf</a> - <a href="http://www.metacafe.com/">The funniest home videos are here</a></font>

Post by **Artguy** » June 29th, 2008, 10:17 am

I like what Mark Twain had to say on the subject og golf - "waste of a good walk."

Post by **mtmynd** » June 29th, 2008, 10:29 am

fucking funny video! thx for that bennie...

"waste of a good walk..." more like a forced relocation -

"i like it here at the seventh hole... the view... beautiful! maybe put the hammock over there between those two trees. perfect place to relax."

"move on! move on! tee off, fucker! we don't have all day..."

Post by **Lightning Rod** » June 29th, 2008, 10:57 am

I have an idea that could revolutionize the game
Mark Twain would even like it
I call it 'Air Golf'
I think it was actually invented by Johnny Carson, but I'm stealing it

Post by **mtmynd** » June 29th, 2008, 12:32 pm

good idea. but how do you steal air much less invent it..?

Post by **Lightning Rod** » June 29th, 2008, 12:51 pm

I play the air flute, you make the music with actual air

no wait,

isn't that a contradiction of a contradiction in terms?

Post by **mnaz** » June 29th, 2008, 1:14 pm

Wasn't gas more like 20-25 cents (or less) a gallon in the '60s, and early '70s? I remember Dad used to curse when gas got over 30 cents/gal. He'd drive halfway across town for the 22 or 23-cent stuff...

I realize this has nothing to do with golf.

Post by **Lightning Rod** » June 29th, 2008, 1:38 pm

yeah, I remember 19 cent a gallon gas
which was wonderful if you were driving a '55 Buick
that didn't get miles-per-gallon, it got gallons-per-mile
(but it had a back seat like a queen-sized bed....ah memories)
two-tone, yellow over white
it looked like a golf shoe
now do you see what this had to do with golf?

Post by **mtmynd** » June 29th, 2008, 1:50 pm

eLRod : "... driving a '55 Buick... "

my friend back in the late 50's would borrow his dad's 52 Mercury. talk about a back seat! same with the dashboard - you could take a nap on it it was so big. would get three in the trunk goin to the drive in. what memories.

golf? who said anything about golf? wasn't that a VW model?

Post by **Lightning Rod** » June 29th, 2008, 2:00 pm

it's even worse than that, cec
not only did I drive a Buick
I was the chairman of the Taylor County (Abilene) Young Republicans

now I don't drive and I don't vote
we live and learn

think I'll trade my Buick in for a Mercury

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/ovomUNSo_uo&hl ... ram><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/ovomUNSo_uo&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

Post by **Dave The Dov** » June 29th, 2008, 3:55 pm

The cars keep getting bigger
The gas prices keep going up
Everybody complains
But nothing gets done about it
_________________
Honda VFR750R

Post by **Lightning Rod** » July 4th, 2008, 4:16 pm

ok, since this is a nonsense thread, I will add to it

I'm watching Wimbelton today, bennie

I must admit that it's ever so much more boring than golf

and I'm watching the men's finals

tomorrow it will be more exciting

sister act

but golf is boring in a more interesting way than tennis

I don't know what 'love' means

maybe that's my problem

I know what a birdie or a bogie or an ace or a par means

but I don't know what love means

I'm told it's a verb

but I can't find it in my dictionary

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