Letter to a Friend--are we in the Moment?

[Lightning Rod]

I don't know exactly when you had 'the moment'
you know, satori, wake up and smell the coffee time
but our recent conversations lead me to believe that you have
had 'the moment'

It's the moment when you realize that your time is limited
and that the only things that are worth doing are the things you love

I had my moment about the turn of the century
my body was ravaged by heroin and methadone and pure lust for life
I looked at my skeletal remains in the bathtub
and realized I had only a limited time left here on the planet
to accomplish whatever the hell it was I'm supposed to do

This shows what a dummy I am
because we all have only a limited time
it just took me over fifty years to realize this

so I had my moment
I realized that there was no time to devote
to working on maggie's farm no mo'
the only things that mattered
were the things that I loved and needed to do
I looked around and the only things that seemed to matter
were my flute, my piano and my notebook

when did you have your 'moment?'

[westcoast]

response to a friend:

I am sorry to shock you -

Regarding the moment, it arrived during the rape as I fought for my life; outta body, looking down at how my finger nails dug into his thigh, the blood, my cries, his drunken slurs for me to stop fighting it..

I knew I would always fight in the moment to live the moment until I was no more.

No more time to waste away what moments remain.

~w

[Lightning Rod]

I understand rape
I have been raped
not in prison, not by a man
but raped by women

you may think this is impossible
(sure, you can't rape the willing)
but there are more devastating types of rape
I'm talking about psychological castration
and systematic smalling down of will and esteem

I've been raped by the State
I've been raped at the gas pump
but I closed my legs

as they say, it's all about power, not sex

[westcoast]

all too true.

[westcoast]

i think there's lots of reasons D.

power is an aphrodisiac, and i don't mean simply in a sexual sense.

unfortunately, it appears the lust for power that abuses remains deeply ingrained in humans.

[Lightning Rod]

It's a choice
you can choose your 'moment'
if you want a rape to define you
then that's your 'moment'

if you want a triumph to define you
then that is your 'moment'

if you want your resolution and vision to define you
you have to take it moment by moment

[westcoast]

one person at a time. individually you change yourself. or if you are talking about larger societal change that's more complicated maybe it requires eons of evolution. maybe it is impossible to remove from humanity (sic).

i'm sure everyone here has a different experience and view.

[westcoast]

D. you change yourself by setting boundaries. Use tough love. Generally, in my experience, people go away when they no longer get a response from you.

BTW - I didn't take Lrod's comments to indicate a physical rape is not as devastating as other forms of rape. It's all horrible and damaging whether a hand is laid upon a person or they are psychologically abused, one example being the emotional abuse suffered by spouses and children.

[Lightning Rod]

I was saying nothing about 'she asked for it'
I was talking about 'how she (or he) took it'

I have had embarrassing sexual experiences too
most of them I asked for but that's on me

what I am saying is that if you let your mistakes or your embarrassments define you, then you are a slave to your bad experiences. You have allowed someone else choose your 'moment.'

You stop it by not letting it define you. You stop it by choosing your own Moment

[stilltrucking]

Lighting Rod
It sounds to me like you only think you have had your moment.

[westcoast]

You stop it by not letting it define you. You stop it by choosing your own MOMENT.

exactly, it is not the rape that defines me. it is how i have chosen to 'be' since that time, putting half a life time of bullshit behind me embracing each new moment.

~westie

[stilltrucking]

My moment will come just before I draw my last breath
Till then
I am trying to fill everymoment I have with love.
passion and compassion

[Doreen Peri]

...

[stilltrucking]

I think you are a kind person Clay
or maybe that is only what I think.
I think it sounds like you only think you have had your moment
of course that is only what I think.

Be kind to yourself
be kind to her
let it go
don't feel hard done by
or if you must
right another somebody done somebody wrong song.
orange you glad you found love
can't you feel grateful for that?
even if it is over

Listen to me man
I am an expert
shit
why am i butting in here?

[Lightning Rod]

I think you are a kind person Clay
or maybe that is only what I think.
I think it sounds like you only think you have had your moment
of course that is only what I think.

Be kind to yourself
be kind to her
let it go
don't feel hard done by
or if you must
right another somebody done somebody wrong song.
orange you glad you found love
can't you feel grateful for that?
even if it is over

Listen to me man
I am an expert

I have always admired your imagination, jack
it is working overtime here