I Married A Euglena

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billectric
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I Married A Euglena

Post by billectric » January 3rd, 2005, 5:32 pm

I Married a Euglena

It was a marriage of convenience. They were trying to deport this giant mutant euglena which I happened to know from a troup of improv vampire performers at the goth club Fangeely's.

A euglena is a single-celled freshwater organism marked by the presence of chlorophyll, a reddish eyespot, and one anterior flagellum. But that's not why I married it.

You see, this euglena, who I shall refer to as Gremamine, was in danger of being deported. Most euglenas move around freely without hassle because they are so small, but Gremamine was doused with radio-active Miracle Grow and ended up about 5 foot three inches, not counting the whip.

Ah, the memories. Rolling in the swimming pool, the bath tub, and the Jacuzzi and limited only by our imaginations and the chlorine levels.

Then it happened. I came home early from work and found Gremamine flogging a venus fly trap with its flagellum! The shock...the heartbreak...

The fly trap's maw undulated as it hissed, "More! More!" in tones not audible to the human ear. Waves of invisible plasma emanated outward from the two plant lovers, filling the room with a ripe vegetable smell.

I ran. Ran as fast as I could and never looked back.

Now I've settled into a small bungalow and share the rent & utilities with a couple of small palm trees. I rarely go out.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v30/B ... ce2325.bmp
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mindbum
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Post by mindbum » January 3rd, 2005, 7:49 pm

this, sire, is hilarious.

not counting the whip.

http://www.jracademy.com/~mlechner/arch ... uglena.JPG

the fly trap. nice nice nice.
godless & songless, western man dances with the stuffed gorilla through all the blind alleys of a dead-end world.

-maxwell bodenheim
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judih
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Post by judih » January 3rd, 2005, 11:21 pm

palm trees may be only rebound, but if you speak to them nicely....
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billectric
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Post by billectric » January 4th, 2005, 2:06 pm

mindbum, thanks for the enlargement. all i want to know is, why are you carrying pictures of Gremamine around with you? Are you the flytrap? Confess!
"Before I was enlightened, I chopped wood and carried water. After I became enlightened, I chopped wood and carried water."
- Zen Teaching
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mindbum
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Post by mindbum » January 5th, 2005, 8:29 am

gremamine is a showgirl
seen in the quarter
whip in hand
laying sticks straight
like toppled ducks in a row

submit
godless & songless, western man dances with the stuffed gorilla through all the blind alleys of a dead-end world.

-maxwell bodenheim
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billectric
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Post by billectric » January 7th, 2005, 1:00 pm

hehehe...that's right...
"Before I was enlightened, I chopped wood and carried water. After I became enlightened, I chopped wood and carried water."
- Zen Teaching
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Arcadia
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Post by Arcadia » January 7th, 2005, 1:23 pm

funny text, bill.
I enjoy reading it.
Saludos,

Arcadia
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