About a month into it...and it's a bear of a job lemme tell you. I'm so totallly into the throes of it...different than much that I've done in the past, but hopefully doable...weird to be the oldest trainee in the room...some sassy young un's in there, being competitive and assholian. But I can remember myself back then, and perhaps this is my karma for my own insensititivites to old ladies when I was in my 30's.
Heh.
I'm just laid back, and learning this shit, sometimes offended at what I see as just plain heartlessness towards people in need of assistance. I mean, sure, there are people that play the system, but I think also there are many that don't and it pisses me off that the few players ruin it for the truly needy ones, the ones who meekly take the denials and shrink off into god knows where, perhaps to die in a dumpster. Sigh.
Why is it that I care so deeply about these folks, why can't I just do the job without thinking of the consequences I am possibly inflicting on some family whose parent is disabled and can't work, and yet I have to deny them assistance because they don't qualify due to some reason that makes most claims impossible to allow?
I better shut up about this. Just a small rant.
I'm liking the city, found myself a very quaint and cheap little one bedroom apt...am keeping things cheap while still this early in this game....I think that is prudent of me.
I feel myself wishing I weren't always alone for things. Wish I had some partner to move with me into this place, and have a cup of coffee and some dinner ready when I get home..it's always about fucking fending for myself with very little...I get so tired of it, of being all alone.
Another rant...don't mind me.
And thanks to those of you who read my last little ditty about naked with a holster on...it's a bright spot for me that piece, I mean the line just jumped into my head outta nowhere like a real inspiration and I was so glad to have one!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Not much time right now for the studio damn it...buy ya'll are writing like champs....I love to go to creative and read the poetry...it's a tonic for me right now.
Anyways, send me your good vibes once in a while...after I move into my new pad I won't have a computer for awhile until I can buy one....so will be libraryin in again....on the weekends.
Ta Ta for now
H
